Mr. Potato was tired of being just a toy. He was also exhausted from being
constantly poked at. He felt down right depressed...so depressed in fact, that
he thought about walking into McDonald's and asking one of the absentminded
teenagers to slice him up and throw him in the deep fryer..
However, as he headed with his little suitcase to his greasy end, his fairy
Godmother Sweet Butter appeared to him and said, "Mr. Potato, I know your
life has been mashed by abuse, but because you have been a very good spud,
I mean sport, I am granting you one wish! What would your dream be? Tell me!"
Mr. Potato, quickly answered, "I want to trade in Wall Street!"
One move from her magic wand and "PUFF" he was transformed into a
very cool, stock expert! Ah, yes...Mr. Potato, found himself in lower
Manhattan's FINANCIAL DISTRICT!! His dream....to stand where he was standing
now, the trading floor of the New York Stock Exchange, ready to make millions!
Everything was calm. The "open outcry" had not begun yet...suddenly the
bell went off and it was madness!!!
"Idaho potatoes crop lost? What a tragedy!!"
"I got an inside tip on the Idaho potato crop. We must sell, sell, sell or we
are scalloped!!!"
"What!! The cows are refusing to give milk? That means no sour
cream!! we must sell, sell, SELL or we'll be baked!!!"
"Impossible!! NO MAYO??? Not good...I say sell, sell, SELL or we'll be diced!!"
"GASP!! I can't ...it can't be true!!! What terrible news....all the tomato
crops eaten by giant bugs? That means no ketchup!!! NO KETCHUP!!!
We are doomed....
SELL....SELL....SELL....or we'll be thrown in a a kettle of hot oil...and
we'll fry !! YIKES!!"
"WOW, I mean WOW!!Are you sure? Why, that's a tremendous
break through....
Lay's is bringing out potato chips that slim you down? We are going to make
MILLIONS...NO!! BILLIONS on this deal!!!....I SAY BUY!!!
BUY!!!!!!
BUY!!!!!!!!!!
BUY!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Mr. Potato is now happily baking, I mean basking, under
the sun, fully loaded in his own private island...
SMOTHERLAND!!!
