FOOD STORIES

ASSAULT AND BATTERY PORK. MAFIA STYLE....

  

This is the perfect dish for when things are not going

the way you wished. Today, I have many reasons for preparing

it. If you have not slept  enough  lately, or had a flat tire when you

were driving home ....or are just upset for not being able to afford

pork tenderloins or rib eyes.. this  pork recipe is IT....make sure you

have  "ugly pork chops"  in the fridge at all times, if you are going

through a difficult time in your life....

 THE ASSAULT PART:

 

 First open the fridge and YELL  at the pork chops, "YOU ARE

REALLY GONNA GET IT NOW !" Then reach for them...GRAB

them and THROW them on the cutting board !!! YEAH !!!

 

If there are any bones remove them ...please. So they look like these....

Now ...we need to flatten these suckers....so go look for

something to doit with...I don't have a  meat cleaver....but that

does not stop ME....

       HMMMMMMM.....not wide enough.........NEXT !!!       

 My husband's martial arts weapon....MAYBE......but I am

scared of whacking myself in the face....

 AHAAA !!! A plantain smasher and a knife sharpener!!!

I never use the knife sharpener anyways.... OK...Now, I wrapped foil

around the plantain smasher and I ready to proceed with...

THE BATTERY PART:

 As you flatten it... think....car payment....text message from your

boyfriend breaking up with you, termite inspection fee, the police 

stopped you for having an expired tag, electric bill too high ....

 Hit up and down until it is really thin......This is a real workout!!!

 WHACK, WHACK, WHACK, WHACK, WHACK...

                            ISN'T IT WONDERFUL?....

WHACK, WHACK, WHACK,WHACK ...ARE YOUR BAD FEELINGS

GOING AWAY ??? NOW ...TAKE A DEEP BREATH AND EXHALE S-L-O-W-LY....

NICE AND THIN.......BUT WHISPER...."I ain't done with you yet!"

Dump it on bread crumbs.....both sides....then....surprise it 

with a  dip in .....the  "Yellow River".

Then, take it out again and let it eat more bread crumbs....

slap it and turn it on the other side...

When it has had enough....it looks like this...."capiche?"

JOHNNY....THIS IS LOOKING GOOD.....BUT, YOU AIN'T

FINISHED....THERE'S MORE !!!!

FRYYYYYYYYY....FRYYYYYYYYYY....FRYYYYYYYY...THEM

UNTIL GOLDEN BROWN!!!!!! 

 Now it's ready....take it out and serve with "CRY ME A RIVER PISTO

AND SMASHED POTATOES".

                          PSSSSSSSSSSSST....

  NOW IT'S TIME TO MAKE IT DISAPPEAR !!!!!!!

                        SHHHHHHHHHH !!!! 

 

FISH "DESPERADO".

 

Please, play this video while you read about

my new fish recipe.

  

First...click on the video and wait until the title is over and 

the scene begins...then start reading....slowly.

  

 

 

 

It was high noon in my kitchen...and I stood there. I was thinking....

thinking...and thinking some more. I was hungry. I wanted something

to eat and I wanted it fast. I did my slow walk to the fridge ...opened and

closed my hands and then WHAM, opened the door, faster than a

speeding bullet. I squinted my eyes and looked for something good to eat....

There wasn't much. Leftover rice from last night and tilapia. It made me

feel like spitting in the kitchen sink...PUUAAHHH !!!

  

That wasn't going to fill me up, I did my slow walk to the pantry. Closed

and opened my hands again and WHAM, opened that door. Not much

there either. A can of chick peas and a can of them other peas...the green ones.

Well, I wasn't about to ride my horse to the supermarket !!! I had to do what

I had to do.

  

It had no time to loose  ...I needed to catch that 3:10 train to Yuma...

  

I had no partner to eat with, but that don't mean I don't want to eat good....

I whipped out my ugly cowgirl pan, and splashed it with some olive oil from

my canteen. Then, I shot some onion, celery, carrots and garlic. I made it

dance in the pan. Then I bit open both cans of peas. Them chick ones and

them green ones too. After all was mixed I added some spice,curry. Cowboys

love curry. I also added some tomato sauce. It always reminds me of

GUNS and BlOOD. Then I sprinkled Morton Natures's Seasons

gun powder on both sides of the fish and pan fried it in butter, while the

rice was heating. It was so fast I didn't even shoot photos ...

                          except one.

  

       In life you eat or you die....YOU DECIDE...

  

  

I

 

FOR CRYING OUT LOUD SALAD.

 

Dedicated  with love to my sister, Maribel, who taught me how to

make this dish in Madrid, 25 years ago...and I still love it!!!

 

It was Thursday, my day off, and I was heading to the supermarket to buy 

some very needed groceries. It was one of those weeks...I was down to some

milk, ham, mayonnaise ....wilted lettuce...an empty juice bottle...ugh... a couple

of tuppers filled with who knows what from who knows when...two onions and a 

bag of frozen Ciabatta  rolls.

Ready to open door, I reached for my keys in the drawer of the foyer's table...

But, they were not there! I shouted, "OH, FOR CRYING OUT LOUD...where are

my keys?", then searched frantically in my purse....I searched the house,

high and low.

                             NOTHING!!!

Well, I was trapped with nothing to eat in my own house. Maybe I can call Sandra

and ask her to bring lunch. I dialed her number, and as she said hello, it went

dead..."OH, FOR CRYING OUT LOUD...I can't believe this!!!".  Let me tell you, 

I looked for my cell phone's charger  high and low, and as my nerves got worse

I noticed I was hyperventilating...OOPS, I needed one of these:

  But I didn't find one.... maybe an Ingles' plastic bag will do, I thought as I 

looked under the kitchen sink....but it was like this:

  I was doomed...suddenly, I had an idea. A good cook can always make

something of nothing and so I decided to forget I was temporarily stranded in

my own house and took the ham out of the fridge...

  There was about 3/4 lbs. As I sliced it ...I thought about those keys again...

afterward I put it back in the cold, and went for the onions!

 

I sliced them into very thin rings, cried like a fool and said, "OH, FOR CRYING OUT

LOUD...why are spanish onions so mean to me!"

 

 I added 1 cup of water, salt and covered them with plastic wrap then

microwaved for 15 minutes on high until they wilted and became translucent.

I strained them and added half a cup of the liquid.

  While still warm, I added the ham, the Hellman's Mayonnaise and  gave

it a twirl to mix well. 

  OOOPS, the mayo became very liquid...but , I figured the cold would

fix it. What do I have to loose?

                            MY KEYS???

Into the refrigerator it went. And... as I suspected, the cold made the mayonnaise

really creamy and yummy! Next I toasted some ciabatta bread and VOILA!!!

                       Lunch was served!!!

 

 Once I finished wiping clean my plate with a piece of bread, I felt much better!

Then, it came to me....did I look in Alonso's cart? The one filled with a million 

Hot Wheels? I dashed to his room and turned the cart upside down and said,

"OH, FOR CRYING OUT LOUD ...there they are!!".

 

 THAT LITTLE RASCAL....

                       he took MY keys for HIS cars!!!

 

I WILL NEVER GO TO HAWAII CHICKEN...

 

                                                                                              Mayra and I...pretending to be in Hawaii 

 

Time to face it....It's difficult for me even to travel to Spain to see my 

family. So I better kiss goodbye my dreams of going to Hawaii....However, I can

always cook the national dish....it's actually called Adobo Chicken. Two years

ago, my sister Hilda and I, with the help of our families filmed, at home, a  Food

Network type show. It was about how to have fun with low budget parties. We

chose a Hawaiian party of course.... Raul, my son-in-law, and I edited it, and the

result was actually quite cute for not knowing what we were doing. Since then,

Adobo Chicken has become a family favorite.

 

One of the things I like best  about this dish is...NO ONIONS.... and it's

so fast to prepare! It will be done before you can say:

"I WISH I COULD BE IN WAIKIKI BEACH AND NOT HERE...

PAYING MY BILLS... IKI...IKI".

                      Part 1

 OK....STOP DAYDREAMING RIGHT NOW and pay attention, please.

 This is what you will need: garlic, bay leaves, pepper corns, green onions.

                                                 and.......chicken thighs....

                                          and.......soy sauce....white vinegar

    NOW,  go check how expensive a ticket to Hawaii is.  Come back to the 

kitchen...and mash the garlic.....

   Then....get a freezer bag put the chicken inside and everything else....

except the green onion, that's the final touch....Oh, yeah...brown

sugar! That, next to the bay leaves, is brown sugar ....

                                

                              Close it ...shake it and put in the fridge....say,

                              "That's were you are staying baby".

  Congratulations!! You have worked soooooo hard....go ahead

take a shower and cool off.......YOU ARE DONE WITH PART 1.

                          PART 2

 A few hours later, OR even better the next day ....bring the bag out,

empty it in a pot...and start playing Hawaiian music....

                                              Heat it up and bring to a boil .....

            It doesn't look delicious....but wait...wait my little Hawaiian flower.... 

When all the sauce has been reduced...look at the results!!

                                       YUMMY!!!

 

I'ts done. Time to eat! Go put a pretty flower in your hair, hurry!! 

                                            What did you say?

 Ah,  you are  wondering what to serve it with? Just do like the Hawaiians! 

 Serve with two scoops of white rice and one scoop of Hawaiian

macaroni salad, and don't forget to top the chicken with thinly sliced

green onion. Yes, I did my research ...and for dessert Haupia!

 

 P.S. Here I am preparing ADOBO CHICKEN  "part 1" (Sorry, it's in Spanish)

   

 

 

 

 

AT LEAST I CAN PRETEND TO BE IN HAWAII PUDDING.

It's June and it feels like August... how depressing!!!

I need a vacation. How about you?

 

It's hot, humid, sticky, and I am fighting huge mosquitoes. Am I in the

Amazon? NO! This is Georgia. Good old Southern heat you all...!!! I don't 

feel like cooling off with iced tea or watermelon like the folks do down

here. Heck no! I have had enough of that already. I have had enough of 

the mosquitoes too!

 

OH, how I would love to be somewhere else...far away... in the Hawaiian

Islands, I said to myself. Well, I can't go but...I can cook something 

that will transport me far away from Auburn, Georgia to a beautiful,

relaxing beach in Hawaii!!! Yeah, that I can do.

 

So, I got off my sofa where I was daydreaming with Waikiki, and headed 

to my kitchen. I always keep a couple of cans of coconut milk for those 

times when I need to "escape" to Hawaii. The ingredients for Haupia,

the favorite Hawaiian dessert, are definitely cheaper that an

airplane fare. 

 

                                               It's this easy:

                                      2 cups coconut milk

                                1 cup Moo Moo milk. (cow milk)

                                       3/4 cups sugar

                                    1/2 cup cornstarch

                                    2 tsp vanilla extract

                                        a pinch of salt

 I mix the cornstarch with the Moo Moo milk, making sure there are no lumps.

Then I mix the rest of the ingredients in a pan. I will stir, stir, stir in medium

high heat until it thickens, making sure to lower the heat if necessary. Oh, that

coconut aroma....Ummmmm!!!

When it has thickened and looks like this it is time to remove itfrom the heat.

It's done.....Now, it's time for me to lick that spoon!!!

Then...just pour that thick pudding in a greased mold  and let it cool for a couple

of hours. Meantime, I will go to my garden and look for a pretty flower to decorate

it with...

Time to take a nap now and dream with the surfers...

I mean dream with the surf!

                           2 hours later....

                 and some very, very nice dreams...

                      I will flip it onto a plate and it's ready to be served.

Now don't do like me, I actually was talking to my husband on the phone when I 

flipped it and it cracked...but doesn't the flower do a good job at hiding it?

Don't worry ...be happy, I say to myself, I can start daydreaming now, and leave

Georgia...But first I will click on this video! You do the same and keep reading!

Yes, I am almost dipping my toes in the Pacific Ocean!!!

 

 

So, I cut a slice, and poured some strawberry sauce, that I had prepared in

 minute, by  adding a couple of tablespoons of water to 1/4 cup seedless 

strawberry jam, heated in the microwave, and stirred it well.Then I decorated

my Haupia with lots of whipped cream, and topped it all off with delicious, salty,

crunchy, Hawaiian Macadamia nuts...Oh, my...oh, my!!

                      I can't wait for that first bite!!!

 

  As I sit in front of my TV watching Lilo and Stitch  eating this

Hawaiian delight... I say...

 

AT LEAST I CAN PRETEND TO BE IN HAWAII, 

and forget this southern heat, ALOHA y'all!!

  

 

ONCE UPON A TIME IN CUBA...

                    ONCE UPON A TIME IN CUBA....

  There was a woman, known to all in the Island for her great beauty,

her sensual dancing, her love for chickens, and her passion for cooking.

Her name was Juana....Juana "la Cubana".

 

She was the direct descendant of a Spanish conquistador, Gabriel de Aragon, who had

broughthis wife Carmen de Bernal to live in the new colony...Gabriel and Carmen, fell in love

with Cuba. So much so that they disobeyed the order of his Royal Highness King Ole

Flamenco to return whence they came from.  Spain. Gabriel and Carmen went inland and

hid... never to be seen again.

 

Centuries later, their great- great- great- great- great-great-great-great-great-great-grand-

daughter, Juana, was born. She was a special child. She danced before she walked, and

chickens would follow her everywhere she went...

By the time she was a teenager, Juana, was known in her town of Matanzas as the

"Chicken whisperer"...

 

However, she grew into a mesmerizing woman, and a great dancer. By the late 1930's she

was the hottest attraction at the Copa Cabana. She swayed her hips like the palm trees in

the beach during a hurricane. Men from all over the world came to admire her talent ...and

buy her chocolates. But, she refused them all...Thus, becoming even more desirable!

 

One of those men...was Ernest Hemingway. Yes, Juana, was the real reason why he hung

around Cuba drinking mojitos and writing books...

   He longed to kiss her juicy, ruby red lips...and, as he sipped his mojitos he would imagine

 Juana in all her splendor dancing...dancing...dancing...just for him!!!

 Nevertheless, Juana was waiting ...and waiting....and waiting...

Yes, she waited a lot...for good things come with time!!!

  As I was saying...She waited for that one aspecial man to conquer, not only her heart,

but to quench her appetite for..."Ropa Vieja", a Cuban beef stew!!!

  That was the key to her heart. Hemingway, not knowing this, asked her out to dinner

after her last show at the Copa Cabana. She was always very  hungry after dancing 

and she accepted, hoping that he would take her to eat Ropa Vieja...Instead...he took

her to a very popular restaurant called "The Fisherman and the Sea". Not Good.

She looked at the menu. Disappointed, she cried. The server, a young man called Pepe,

spoke to her in a soft voice that sounded like Antonio Bandera's...

-"Miss Cubana, do you not see what your heart desires

in our menu?"

-"Ay chico, no I don't"!!!" she said sobbing.

-" Come with me Miss Cubana ...leave this old man, and I

 will take you to my house where I have all the fixings for

 Ropa Vieja!

Simmered flank steak until it's tender...onions...peppers...

garlic and bay leaf

                      I will first saute the garlic...

                     then add the onions and peppers...

                   and will let it play in the pan a little... 

                    Then I will add the shredded beef...

                 and if you like...some roasted peppers...

             I will finish it off with some tomato sauce!!! 

How is that sounding, my Cubanita? Oh, and then I splash some

red Spanish wine ...you know...we could drink some too....

And finally...I will let it simmer like my passion for you ...

And ...I will serve it to you with hot, steamy white rice and

sweet plantains!!!

 

Juana got up so fast from the table, that she knocked it over! Then

waived goodbye to Hemingway as she ran away with Pepe. The rest

is history. When Juana tried Pepe's Ropa Vieja she knew  he was the

one she had been waiting for!!!

                            After dinner she smoked a cigar.........

                  and danced for Pepe..

 

 

THE TWO PIZZA PIES VISIT.

 Dedicated with love to:  CHRIS & BETH

Over the phone my son, Chris, and I tried figuring out what day we could

spend some "family time" together..... It took 5 weeks, for an "opening"

in our schedules!

 

During these past five weeks not only have I been missing my husband, I have been

missing Chris, Beth, and  my grand-dog Berkus . They live in Atlanta, in a very

nice area close to Perimeter Mall. It's only  a forty five minute drive ,  that is, if 

I- 85 and 285  are not collapsed with rush hour traffic, road work, or accidents.

The distance between us is not great, yet  we don't get to see each other very

often. Only once or twice a month. Why? They juggle jobs and school. I

juggle....blah, too many things! But, thank God, there is a day when our daily

life's routine permits us to make room for a  "quality time visit" to  enjoy each

other's company.

 

I had seen them last, the night before Pepe's trip. Which means, of course, over

a month. Chris was at the end of his college semester...and that meant all his free

time is dedicated to studying. Therefore, we waited for his two week break to make

plans. Finally, we set aside Wednesday  the 31st. That was only 2 days away! After

talking with Chris, I wondered ...that day I had to work...hmmmm, dinner would

have to be cooked either the day before, or it would have to be something fast!

I love cooking for them. This time ...I'd rather not.  To be in the kitchen,  would

take time away from conversing with them,  and I really didn't want that to

happen. Still, I would probably end up cooking as always, and just in case I

mentally reviewed their favorite dishes to see which I could prepare.

 

Chris and Beth love my  "frituritas de maiz" or corn fritters. That could be a good

choice...I only needed...

                                                   1 (8oz) can cream style sweet corn...

                                                           1 tsp baking powder

                                                                           two eggs....

                                                about 1/2 a cup flour

                      1 tbs. sugar and a couple  pinches of salt. Hot oil for frying...

                             I imagined a drop of  batter to test the oil...

                                                      then the first spoonful ...

WOOOOOOOOOO!!!  I could see them frying and the aroma!

I just love them....!!!!!!!!!!

                                    the batter puffs up and turns golden brown...

I could see myself savoring one! I can't resist them..... I always have the first one out

of the pan! OK, but what should I make with it? A pork roast would have to be cooked

the day before. No, better not. A roasted chicken with my mom's "adobo" would be

delicious, but I didn't want to have them waiting on dinner...they can't leave too late! How

about some pasta? No...they had that last time. Paella? no...too many ingredients.

Lentils? Lentils and what else? Oh, cream of carrots and butternut squash...Chris

loved it when he was a kid! Or maybe pork chops, rice and yuca with "mojo"...

but Chris likes black beans withit, and I like to add plantains!....Forget it,

that would mean too much time in the kitchen! But...but...but...maybe I can just

go with thin "filetes" and home fries. Nothing in this world like potatoes fried  in

good olive oil...the sprinkled with salt, and I could make an avocado salad to go with it.

That sounded good...Chris would love the fries. Beth would love the avocado salad. 

I only needed.........

Red firm tomatoes, ripe avocados, onion and a lemon...

How I would cut the avocado? It didn't matter ...slices or chunks...

I saw myself squeezing  lemon juice over it ...

                                           then slicing the onion... 

                                        and adding the tomatoes ...

I then wondered if I had the ingredients for the dressing. I went to the kitchen

and looked in the cabinets. Great, I did! I only needed 2/3 cups of olive oil, and

1/3 cup of red wine vinegar...1tsp sugar ...a couple of pinches of pepper

and... about 1/4 tsp salt.  

The steaks...I could stop in "La Potosina" on the way home. After all, thin steaks

are so fast to pan-fry and all I had to do was add some mashed garlic, oregano,

salt and pepper.

Yeap...One minute on one side ...turn ...another minute ...DONE!

I liked that idea.

and my favorite part is making the "salsa" at the end by adding some water,

bringing it to a boil and condensing it. Ay, que rico!!!

        

                                          I imagined Christopher's plate..

                                                                I imagined Beth's plate...

Yes, I think I will stick to this plan. Sound good and they will enjoy it!

Wednesday came around. I was at work  dying to leave early so I could start

with dinner. The phone rang. It was Chris!

 

-"Hey mom! What's the plan for dinner?" He asked in a good mood.

-"Ahhhhh....I thought something simple, filetes con patatas... why?..."

-"Just thinking, would you like me to bring pizza? You always cook...

let's just relax."

-"Oh, you don't have to...I can make something". I just didn't want him

spending money...but it sounded great!

-"No, you know ...I'm on my way to your house, and close to a restaurant

that a friend of a friend owns. Caprese,...it's called Caprese, right over 

by Hamilton Mill, and thought I could bring two pizza pies over!"

I said to myself,  pizza pies....he said pizza pies! I don't know why

that sounded so funny to me! What I did know ...is that it meant:

 "YOU -OUT- OF- THE -KITCHEN".

 -"Oh, yeah! I know the place! It's really good. You know Chris ...I WOULD

 LOVE TO HAVE PIZZA!"'

-"Outstanding, I will bring a couple of pizza pies and we can chill".

-"Chris did you bring Berkus?"

  -"Yes, of course".

I smiled...we all love Berkus...and he loves Alonso so much!

-"Great, I wanted to see him! I'll see you guys around 5 Ok...bye!

I got a customer!"

 

After taking  care of the customer I decided to clock out a little early, and

dash to the produce section for a bag of spinach and some tomatoes. I would

make a simple salad of spinach, tomatoes and onions drizzled with my

vinaigrette dressing! Pizza and salad.... THAT WAS IT!

 

I drove home happily...I couldn't wait to hug them! Chris and Beth make such

a nice couple, it's a joy to spend time with them. How on earth did my son find

such a nice girl? ...How on earth does she put up with Christopher's "eccentric"

character?... Oh, yes, what a pair...I guess that's what makes their visits so

much fun!

 

I couldn't wait to be at home. I couldn't wait to see them

coming up the stairs with Berkus and 2 pizza pies.....

  

  

 

PITTY PARTY CABBAGE.

Cabbage for dinner?

Yes, cabbage.  There was a head of cabbage in the fridge, some onions and

Polish sausage. I don't feel like cooking. I am sure you don't either. I am

depressed. You probably are too. So, I made up this dish, perfect for when WE are

moping around the house and don't want to cook for  hours....

                    Who  do you  think I am.....Julia Childs ?

         *************************

 

Are you depressed?  You had a pitty party and now you are short on time to

make dinner? Try this dish. Fast, economical and looks like it took a long time to

prepare.

                                              Cabbage...

 How much cabbage? I DON'T KNOW!!! 1small... or 1/2 a large one, I guess.

                                     Onions.....

Whatever you have left after that "tortilla de patata" you made the other 

night. 2 would be good...I guess, or maybe 1 large. I am tired,long day.

Don't ask too many questions !!

                                               Sausage....... 

ANY KIND... I used Polish ...you can use hot dogs for all I care ...oil ...salt...

some white wine.

Oh, forgot a couple of garlic... don't worry ...don't peel or nothing just let leave

them there to brown then throw away !!!! Don't they look sad ?

                       SO lonely in the pan.....makes me want to cry !!

                          Now throw in the onions....LIKE YOU HATE THEM !!

When they are brown from ignoring them...throw in the disgusting 

sausage....... they taste good...but they are NOT pretty....

After stirring everything like there is no tomorrow...add the cabbage...

How should cut it ? LIKE IN THE PHOTO !!!

STIR...STIR... Share that white wine you are sipping while cooking...don't

worry the heat will kill the germs....WHO'S GONNA KNOW ? PEOPLE EAT

ALL THE TIME OUT...DO YOU REALLY KNOW WHAT THEY DO WITH

YOUR FOOD? NO.

Let it all blend.....one sigh....two sighs....three sighs..... Cry ...

it's that easy !!!

                      Now comes the best part.... FROZEN WAFFLE POTATOES !!!

                                           IS YOUR MORTGAGE DUE ?

                    RIP THAT BAG OPEN WITH YOUR MOUTH...then fry some....

Get that cheap Walmart mustard out of the fridge... no one know the

difference....

Put it together like this...add a little color with diced tomatoes, sprinkled with

oregano, cumin, salt, oil and vinegar...See the mustard? Can anyone tell it's

Walmart brand ? NO! Now tell your husband you are stressed over those

potatoes ...the little holes took forever to carve!! Then do something

for YOU. Run to the gym ...go to the movies... or read a good book and ...

                   GET SOME THERAPY !!!

 

 

 

 

 

SPAGHETTI A LA SILENT KILLER.

Are you having a bad day?

Are you miserable?

Are you eating carbs and fat to fight stress?

 

Pssssssssst! Psssssssssssst!! YES....YOU!!! 

Come closer.......closer I said...I'm going to whisper ....

Are you tired of eating chips and dips? Burgers and fries? Corn dogs and fried

pickles? Pizza and garlic rolls? Fried chicken and  buttery mashed potatoes with

lots of gravy? Ice cream, Cakes, pies, doughnuts, and fried Twinkies?

                  YES?

I know what you want then...You want something that

will  really stick to your arteries, huh?

Does bacon sound good to you?

Does rich, creamy, heavy cream sound good to you?

Does Parmesan cheese sound good to you?

Does spaghetti sound good too? 

YES, I am sure everything sounds good. Right?

 Believe me. I got the perfect recipe for you.

SPAGHETTI A LA SILENT KILLER...it's to die for!

The more you eat ....the faster you will go!

Ingredients: All very bad for your health...but oh...so yummy!!!!!!!!!

1/2 lb spaghetti, 10- 12 thick bacon slices, 2 quarts heavy whipping cream,

3/4 cup Parmesan cheese, 1 tbs chicken bullion.....

                                          Cut the bacon into Small pieces.

                                  I use scissors ....way easier than with a knife.

                                          Start frying it...until golden brown. 

                                          OK....OK...you can have some ...

                                          but leave enough for the sauce!!!

                                         Add spaghetti to boiling salted water....

             In the pan where you cooked the bacon add the heavy cream...

              heat to a boil.

                                       Lower heat, add the Parmesan cheese....

                                                          keep stirring...

                             Add the bacon, reserve some to top the spaghetti later!

                                   Add the bullion....heat until sauce thickens.

                                                    Remove from heat...

When the spaghetti is done, don't rinse. Just take out and put in a

seving bowl. Add sauce...

                                                       And more sauce....

                                                         and more....

Until it looks like this! The sauce will thicken more with the heat

from the spaghetti...

                       UMMMMM....UUUmmmmmm....UUUMMMMM!!!!!!! 

               CHOLESTEROL TAKE ME AWAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!

Note:

If you have little ones in the house don't leave the Parmesan cheese where

they can reach it....

This happened to my newly steamed carpet when, Alonso, my grandchild,

got a hold of the cheese.......

              I NEARLY HAD A HEART ATTACK!!!